So, you've got a great idea or story and you want to share it with someone. Regardless if it's your boss, a colleague, investor, friends or family, you will have to convince them that it's a great idea or topic. This isn't always an easy task. Especially if you're not a gifted speaker, sales person or presenter. Have you ever wondered what makes a good sales person? Have you ever wondered why some people seem more intelligent, or "smooth" than others? There are elements and styles to their communication skills that you should be aware of. Let's discuss a few things that could attribute to a good communicator.
People are busy in this day in age, and no one wants to be around someone who babbles. It's important that you articulate your point clearly, and in a fashion that your audience will understand. In other words, get to the point!
Your success may be at stake if you're caught uttering filler words such as "um" "uh" and "like" during the absence of thought.
While the fashions of public speaking change, the psychological facts about language remain the same. For instance, we conventionally believe that people who say “um” a lot when they speak are unsure, over-careful, or nervous
These habits can be evidence of inefficiencies in your everyday speaking, and may cause people to avoid conversations with you whenever possible. You may survive verbal embarrassment on a personal level, but can be detrimental to your success in relationships, negotiations, sales, as well as casual conversation.
When you engauge in conversation with someone, it's vital that you constantly monitor their response (both verbally and physically) to what your'e saying. Just because it's interesting to you, does not mean it's interesting to them. They may give you clues that they're not interested in the current conversation. For example: a person may try to change the subject, or even worse, they may constantly say "uh huh" quickly after you finish speaking. This may be a sign that they have already tuned you out, and are either ready to move on to a different subject, or they have lost interest in speaking to you altogether. It's key that you pick up on these signals before you cross the point of no return. In other words, you may earn the reputation as being too talkative, uninteresting, or simplay put: a blabbermouth.
Talking slower, and really thinking before you speak is one way to ensure you don't stumble with your words.
A study by Nicholas Christenfeld, a psychologist at the University of California at San Diego, showed that about half the listeners to a speech naturally pay attention to the content. The other half listen to the style. But when the content gets boring, obvious, or offensive, the content listeners switch to listening for style. The solution for getting fewer people to notice your speaking style—and those pesky “ums”—is pretty clear:
Be more interesting.
Great content is what people expect from anything that consumes their time. Regardless if it's a website, conversation with a friend, or watching a YouTube video or movie. Great content usually envokes an emotional reaction with the viewer. People typically seeking to be entertained want to be fascinated, shocked, frightened, reminiscent, empathetic, or sympathetic with your content. If you can't strike one of those responses then it's not likely that they will share your content with friends, much less come back to see if you have anything more interesting to talk about at a later date.